Europe assesses economic policy as everyone’s credits cards are declined

Over half of the population of Europe has come to the crushing realisation that living a “champagne lifestyle on beer money” doesn’t actually work as their cards were all repeatedly declined yesterday. “It was the biggest we’ve seen” said Continue reading “Europe assesses economic policy as everyone’s credits cards are declined”

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Arkady Babchenko fools Penn and Teller with death defying “Dead Spy” trick

A hush descends on the audience. Penn and Teller go into deliberations a pained expression on Penn’s face. Have they figured it out? Alyson Hannigan is stalling Continue reading “Arkady Babchenko fools Penn and Teller with death defying “Dead Spy” trick”

Bank of England wins diversity award after adopting BGT selection process

“We’ve done it again!” said one of the panelists after the selection was finalised, “it’s an amazing privilege to work for such an openly diverse team, one which is only enhanced by this latest innovation, the BGT showdown.” Continue reading “Bank of England wins diversity award after adopting BGT selection process”

FCA sends men with baseball bats to get banks to coff up

Following 2 years of investigations into how to deal with the underhand tactics deployed by high street banks issuing loans with outrageous interest rates, the regulator has chosen a classic “if you can’t beat them, join them” approach. Continue reading “FCA sends men with baseball bats to get banks to coff up”

“tech and spoon” race set to become worlds most boring story in the history of races ever

“Tri-li-on! Tri-li-on! Tri-li-on!” the cheers are deafening as the contenders enter the thunder dome, eggs teetering atop silver spoons. The tribalism apparent Continue reading ““tech and spoon” race set to become worlds most boring story in the history of races ever”